I N D I V I D U A L I S T

And I Wonder

2011-03-05T08:04:00.002+08:00

Is this world worth it?

Chaotic Mind

2011-02-24T00:21:00.002+08:00

I have so many thoughts on my mind right now just after reading a few things.

Articles, sentences, phrases.

I've decided that I need to put my thoughts down or I would never get rid of these distraught. I'm going to post my thoughts on whatever issues here from now on, and not just contemplate about it then forget those newly-formed ideas moments later.

This is a reminder and a promise to myself that I would speak out my thoughts and not keep them confined in me, because I think I need to share more than just vague posts, though those vague posts will appear now and then. Especially to topics relating to emotions, which is still a concept I am trying to come to term with.

No, I am not a robot. I'm an INTJ, but not a robot. I'm a fully-functioning human being, only with so much on my mind that sometimes it becomes overwhelming. But I embrace these thoughts because they define me.

I fold my rubbish before throwing it away

2011-01-27T21:22:00.000+08:00

It's back. That feeling of disconnection is back. Maybe I should embrace this feeling. It seems that it's inevitable. Unavoidable.

It truly is frustrating. The contradiction between what I feel and what I think. I always can't seem to resolve which ends up in triumph. I can never tell if one has affected the other.

On a totally related note, saghafhafdhjagakjfghfalkjghaghsdljghrslfgakjskjarsb.

A Look Back

2011-01-24T04:47:00.005+08:00

It's been a long time since I've posted anything here. I've always had the intention of posting more often, but never really got around to it. It seems as if when I decide that I want to say something, a voice in my head always manage to conjure up reasons as to why I should not.

They're logical.

Mostly.

That's one thing I've been grappling with recently. The logic of things. When I think back to my thought processes in the past, (yes, I actually remember my thought processes. Don't ask how I do, I just do.) everything seems to be simpler. Not that things were ever simple. It's just comparative. Everything back then just seemed like it was. Simpler.

Now, it feels like I can't wrap my head around things that I used to be able to. The first conclusion I arrived at was that things are different, so I can't make judgement using processes I used in the past. Then I realized that wasn't it. Sure, things are different, but that wasn't my problem.

Subsequently, I concluded that I've changed. My perception has changed. That much I know. But could it be that simple? That everything is different because I've changed? That honestly was not something I was willing to accept. It's not that I'm afraid of change. It's a concept that captivates me. Change is exciting. It provides a one-way escape from the mundane and I know a thing or two about escape.

This would be a great moment for a conclusion, wouldn't it? The thing is, I can't conclude just yet because things are still running their course. At this instant, all I can observe is that things manifest. Everything does not simply change. It takes seemingly new forms, which when examined closely still retains some of its old fragments. At least that's how it is with my perception. I still comprehend events as I always did, only with added perspective. The usefulness of that added perspective is still under observation so there's not much I can say on that matter at this moment.

But I can say this: I'm still as confused as ever.

What a Mess

2010-09-02T00:18:00.002+08:00

My room looks like the zoo has rampaged through it.

zzzzz.

Random Rantings (part... I lost count)

2010-08-25T02:11:00.000+08:00

One of my idiosyncrasies includes having a brain that functions better late into the night, when everyone else is asleep.

Why am I posting this? I have no idea.

I'm exhausted and mentally drained. I have spent the past three days revolving my thought processes around TOK. A few days before that acclimatizing my brain so that it does not get a shock.

Though I don't see the need to, since it's hell inside my head anyway.

When this is all over much later in the day, I shall try to turn the convoluted nature of my brain off for a few hours and get some REM sleep. Without any alarm clock disturbing me this time.

The Disruption of a Mind

2010-08-22T22:17:00.005+08:00

I'm feeling one of those feelings not of sheer helplessness, but of a profound disconnection and disorientation. This leads to the questioning of the origins of such acute sensation.

How did that sinking feeling at the pit of my stomach come about?

Can I ever escape the mental torture brought about by this confusion and frustration?

I have tried too many times to let go of this distress; but distractions don't last long and escape is out of the question at this moment, even if there ever was a way.

Then what is a human entity to do?

One of those random rant

2010-08-10T21:29:00.002+08:00

I am exhausted, annoyed, frustrated and in pain.

So, BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.

Firefly

2010-06-22T08:36:00.002+08:00

I now understand why Sheldon was so upset over the cancellation of Firefly.

I have to say, I totally agree with him.

The Plead of a Confounded Mind

2010-05-23T13:53:00.000+08:00

Emptiness, take a hike.

Random Contemplation

2010-05-16T20:48:00.001+08:00

I've always wondered how things would turn out if different decisions have been made. Considering the theory of multiple universes that consist of our different choices; I've always wondered how I would feel in the alternate universes.

How different would I be? How different would I be feeling?

I'm not regretting the past. That's futile. So logically, there isn't the need to waste effort on regretting. Though I am curious of the 'forces of the universe' or in other terms some call it 'fate and destiny'.

I know that my actions would affect the immediate things to come. But what about far from now?

Maybe I should create some sort of 'actions and consequences' chart. But then again, I am far too lazy and forgetful to take on such a laborious task.

The Tired Mind

2010-05-09T19:21:00.002+08:00

http://purplehuman.blogspot.com/2009/07/distant.html

Because there are no other ways to phrase how I've been feeling.

Dragon Age: Origins - Awakening

2010-03-07T19:07:00.000+08:00

March 16th.

Talking darkspawn. Oghren. New map. More darkspawns.

omgomgomgomgomgomgomg.

What's Up

2010-03-06T19:49:00.000+08:00

Blog re-opened. But don't expect frequent postings. You'd have better luck trying to teach a cow quantum physics.

Dragon Age: Origins

2009-12-11T22:18:00.001+08:00

STUPID ALISTAIR.

I will not rest until I get the ending I desire, period.

Dragon Age: Origins

2009-12-06T19:33:00.001+08:00

I just thought this was really funny:

"i don't understand why anora won't marry my female human noble-
that is so closed-minded of her given that calin wasn't that far off from bieng a female."

(taken from Gamespot Forum)

You probably won't understand it if you don't play the game. Heh.

I'm bored and I feel like posting funny weird stuffs from Typology Central

2009-10-12T15:22:00.000+08:00

An INTP ranting:

"I have an INFJ friend who claims he's not under the bounds of logic,
and that he can just believe whatever he wants.

He says some weird stuff, like "maybe the world just poofed into existence out of nowhere", which defies the principle of sufficient reason. And, "I am a moral skeptic, but right now I will pick a side and defend moral relativism" -- If you are a moral skeptic, defend skepticism. And the best of all

Me: "Those two statements are incompatible."
Greg: "I can say whatever I want!"

He didn't argue that they weren't incompatible. He argued that it didn't matter that they were incompatible.

Problem is, anything I say to show to him that he has to follow logic, also involves logic.

The thing that worries me is, what if people like him end up with power of some kind?"

Reply from another INTP:
"Just say you can talk to plants."

-----------------

Random statement:
"I'm right because I'm always right and therefore, by circular reasoning, I must be correct."

-----------------

What an eNTP said after reading How to Lose Your Mind in Under an Hour :

"This book has made me discover that I am really a dolphin.

If you don't believe me, you're closed minded."

-----------------

Whee.

Not = 1

2009-10-06T19:58:00.000+08:00

Seriously. I think he is freaking stressed. Or maybe he's an alien. I'll go with the latter. And NO I am not an alien.

Here was how another weirdly normal conversation between me and my brother go:

Me: "Shit, why am I not stressed."

Him: "Because NOT = 0"

Me: "What the fish?"

Him: "Well you see, you are not stressed because you are stressed. So, NOT STRESSED = STRESSED. Since STRESSED is the common multiple in both sides of the equation, NOT ~~STRESSED~~ = ~~STRESSED~~ ..."

Me: "You FAIL. NOT =/= 0. NOT = 1"

Him: "... SHHH I'm studying."

Seriously.

Retarded-ness

2009-09-23T00:42:00.001+08:00

My bro about my room in Indonesia: "Your room's so bright. So happy-happy. So weird."

Me: "But I'm a happy person."

Bro starts laughing like a hyena, "My pinky's happier than you!"

More stupid quotes by my brother

2009-09-17T19:29:00.000+08:00

1. "Guys don't cry. We just sweat from our eyes."

2. "I'm so spicy that when the mosquito bit me, it died."(Long story...)

3. (Upon seeing a french fry on a cookie)

"It's a fry cooker!"

Holy Cow

2009-08-16T15:32:00.004+08:00

I am:

89% amused
8% weirded out
3% confused

When things get absurd

2009-08-14T03:07:00.003+08:00

I question the stability of the human mind.

Crossroad

2009-08-10T23:09:00.004+08:00

Sometimes, you just wonder if you've chosen the right path.

Weirdness in the Morning

2009-08-01T09:32:00.007+08:00

Brother: "How did I get from the sofa into my room last night?"

Me: "The Oompa Loompas came and brought you there."

Brother: "Is Mercedes cheap in German?"

Me: ||>_>

Doorknobs and Claustrophobia

2009-07-27T03:21:00.000+08:00

Today, I learnt how the doorknob works.

My brother was locked in the bathroom; crying and freaking out. Had to dismantle the doorknob, using a cleaver of all things.

Now, there's just a hole in place of a knob.

Emotions

2009-07-20T23:43:00.000+08:00

If I could have had my way, I would have been born without emotions.

Sometimes

2009-07-20T23:41:00.001+08:00

Sometimes, I just feel as if patience is over-rated.

If

2009-07-15T20:04:00.000+08:00

If it all ends right now, would anybody care?

Insomnia

2009-07-13T00:57:00.001+08:00

How do you sleep when your brain just won't take a rest?

Distant

2009-07-10T22:20:00.008+08:00

Have you ever felt as if your mind is at one end of the universe while your body is stuck at the other end?

Two things supposedly so close and yet so far apart.

It's as if I'm here and yet I'm not.

Fitting a square into a circle

2009-07-07T22:15:00.006+08:00

Useless.

The World

2009-07-02T18:38:00.006+08:00

It confusingly amazes me.

Obviously

2009-07-01T23:43:00.010+08:00

Page 54 of the IB Economics course companion:

"Indeed, if we do not have food, then we will die, so it is very necessary."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Stone, Rock and Ultimate Lameness

2009-06-30T15:31:00.020+08:00

" 'Are you stoning?' 'No, I'm thinking about rock.' HAHAHA!!!"

Two words: Lame brother.

Eye-roll times gazillion.

Edit:

My bro, again:

*takes a piece of tissue and roll it into a ball*

Imagine this is a rock.

*throws and rolls ball of tissue onto the table*

Rock and Roll!

I am epicly speechless at my epicly lame brother.

Escape

2009-06-29T23:35:00.008+08:00

Maybe I should embrace Objectivism.

Or shave my head, migrate to the mountains and live with the monkeys.

Oh, the possibilities.

The Last Airbender

2009-06-28T02:13:00.006+08:00

Trailer. So cool.

Dev Patel as Zuko. Even cooler.

Photo taken from: http://images.allmoviephoto.com/2010_The_Last_Airbender/2010_the_last_airbender_002.jpg

Procrastination

2009-06-19T22:57:00.005+08:00

My bro: "I can't believe we're watching a documentary about virus and there's this whole H1N1 thing going on."

Me: "We fail at procrastinating."

Who watch documentaries and call it procrastination?

We do.

Random Rantings

2009-06-18T04:52:00.004+08:00

Notice how in those movies,

Where one of the characters were granted their wish of ultimate knowledge?

And how those characters end up killing themselves, because the knowledge was too much to bear?

But when you have knowledge of everything, wouldn't you actually realize the beauty of this world?

And that there is so much to live for?

My brain goes weird when I don't sleep.

The Evil Bunny

2009-05-27T00:56:00.003+08:00

May the bunny eat you up while you're all sleeping.

Peace out.

INTJ

2009-05-14T19:32:00.002+08:00

Hello.

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp

Random lameness

2009-05-13T18:04:00.007+08:00

My freakishly lame brother: "Do not flatulate. Your flatus is fetid."

Note: The freak/lame-o was talking to himself. He's probably too stressed over his Biology exam.

But seriously, don't you see the kind of lame-ness I have to put up with, every single day?

This is the reason why I roll my eyes so much.

Life

2009-05-06T20:16:00.004+08:00

%$#%$#@$#@%$#@$#@$!#$#@#$#@$@$!

Fish.